I know you can hear me but are you listening?

How do you get across to an extremely intelligent preteen that you need to apply yourself so you can succeed in life?
How do you answer them when they say that they are afraid to disappoint so they don’t even try?
How does a parent explain the importance of being good as a person and as a student to be successful.
How do you distnguish between the unconscious manipulation of a child as a survival instinct versus a conscious manipulation as a character flaw?

I don’t have answers for all of the above but I do have an idea how I am planning to approach it. Once a parent, always a parent. You always want your child to succeed. Some succeed with just a little guidance whereas others need a lot more work. If you ask anyone the definition of success, they all have different meanings. For me – it is the ability to do anything that you want whenever you want. In order to do that you have to have the resources and the intelligence to do so.

That is why education is important. Take tough problems early so that you get used to solving them. Be honest and work hard and people will recognize it. As a parent when you see the qualities of your children – good or bad – point it out. Given your experience as a parent – you can tell them the highs and lows of certain behavior.

You nudge, push, yell, scold, hug, threaten, bribe, cajole and reward – whatever it takes to make them see reason. In the end all you can do is hope and pray that they cared enough or were scared enough to listen.

3 Responses to “I know you can hear me but are you listening?”

  1. Manoj says:

    I came across a book called Doing School by Denise Pope in the TV show Boston Legal, should be worth reading for you and Mallika as it talks about how the students are running around doing so many things to get into a good school that they have stopped learning and are just “doing school”.

  2. Manoj says:

    Whatever you wrote makes so much sense and I am sure will echo with a lot of parents. I did hear this while I was growing up with a shake of the head every time my maths marks dropped below 95 :-)

  3. Word Dancer says:

    I will get a hold of that book.
    You know I heard that too – all the time. Hoepfully the kids are listening.:)