Sacrifice is another name for love…

YashodaKrishna

..at least in India it is.  A woman when young is identified as whose child she is, then when she gets married as whose wife she is and then when she has children by whose mother she is.  The Indian culture is old, at least 5000 years, and the rituals and customs and language and traditions have not died through the passage of time and invasion by the foreigners.

Now, we face a different kind of invasion or would it be exvasion – if there is such a word.  When those who grew up with the old traditions start to incorporate the western psyche as part of their personality.  I admit I am one of them.  I was asked by a friend if my new found freedom and journey is something that everyone is comfortable with, especially my husband and I can honestly tell you – No.  It is so much outside his comfort zone that he is not sure how to handle it.  I have to give him credit – it is hard and he is doing fine.

In the olden days – when women did all the nurturing and men did all the hunting and gathering – there was a strict demarcation of roles.  I am sure even in those days the women must have felt that they could do more but the men had a hard time with it.  If you have ever read about Sacajawea, the native American lady who helped Lewis and Clarke explore, you will understand what it feels like in those days.   However, in the current day – those roles are not clearly defined and the nurturing is still done by the women.

I don’t think there is anything wrong in incorporating what you see in your environment – after all that is how you grow.  But when you hold on to the past because you are not willing to change or you want to hurry up and ape the west – that does not help either.  Each culture has its own rules based on the environment and if that environment is changed, then you have to change accordingly.

There was a time when women never went outside the house to work and learnt to cook and sew and look after kids.  That was fine as long as the man of the house did not need the wife to work and he made enough to provide for the family.  Nowadays – whatever both parties bring in is not enough since your wants are bigger than your needs.

Most south asian cultures -  it is common to see the mother doing everything for her child.  Her identity is tied to that of her child.  When the child grows up, he repays them by taking care of his parents.  Nowadays, children are so far away they are not able to take care of the parents. In a lot of cases even parents are happier to be on their own.

Times change, cultures adapt and we become more empowered but we as mother still do everything for our children. Why?  Because sacrifice is another name for love.

One Response to “Sacrifice is another name for love…”

  1. Mercy Hamway says:

    I loved reading this post I will be sure to tell my friends about this and link to it as well. Thanks