Secret to a successful marriage

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Image by Michal Hadassah

Have you noticed that if the woman is unhappy – the whole family is unhappy?  Well, you have not figured that out by now, play close attention.  Think about your mom and how you wanted to make sure she was happy.  Even your dad wanted to make sure that was the case – after all he would be the one who had to bear the brunt of that bad mood.

But having being brought up in a society where a lot of respect is given to elders and the culture is about service, most people mistake it for submissiveness.  If you have ever seen My Big Fat Greek Wedding, you remember the scene where the mom says – The man is the head of the household but the woman is the neck and she can turn the head anyway she wants? That’s how it is. When you look at the history of other nations, no other nation had the women as an equal participant in their politics.  The United States is considered a developed nation but they still had to give women the right to vote and have yet to have a woman president.  India, on the other hand already has had a woman prime minister and president and nobody had to give them the right to vote.  Without the women the men would be so lost. LOL!

So what is the secret to a successful marriage? Give the woman her own identity.  Nature has it defined that no matter how much the woman earns or how competent she gets, only she can bear children and provide the nurturing.  It does not matter how loving the father is – a child needs their mom.  So it is inevitable there will be a period of time in the life of the woman where her focus will be her children.  But then, the children grow up – and then what?

During that entire time of child rearing you were always knows as someone’s mom or someone’s wife.  So what happens after that?  Women are always trying to balance family and career and many are okay with that and there are some who are happy to be home and take care of the family and that is commendable too.  But I am sure for many women – who grew up in a household where they were given as much freedom and education as their brothers now find themselves in a situation where 20 years later your kids are all grown up and all your degrees and work experience are in the past and are wondering what to do.

So if you want your marriage days to be happy – be supportive of her, help her find her groove and let me tell you – it will be one very happy household.

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