Am I alone?

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Image by Dan Zen

Heck no! I thought I was the only one who freezes up and did not do stuff cause I was scared of the outcome.  So when my kids ask me ‘What if I don’t succeed?’  Continue reading Am I alone? →

What do you see?

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Image by notsogoodphotography

Am I thin? Am I fat? Am I big? Am I small?  Do I look ugly? Is my nose too big? Am I too tall?  Am I too short?   I am sure you have heard of at least one of the above questions at least once if not more.   Or you may have said them yourself.  I know I have.  There is nothing wrong with those questions, its just when it messes with you your whole entire life that is becomes a problem.

Look around you – whether it is the television, fashion magazines, or pageants – there seems to be this quest for the perfect body that is acceptable by the rest of the world.  Companies sure do well selling anything and everything helping to get that perfect body.  Nothing wrong with that either.

Confidence from within does not just affect girls, it affects boys as well.  When choice of career, the friends you hang out with and the food you eat all has to do with how you see yourself – you wonder how can one small thing affect your whole life.  But that is just the point – it is not small – it is HUGE – and that is an understatement.

So how does on combat that? What can you do to make sure that you have confidence to make the tough choices in life? Some have that inner drive that help them stay on the straight and narrow but what about the others?  It is important that you have a supportive family.  It is important that you are surrounded by friends that support you not put you down.  It is important to focus on the big things in life that make a difference like character and integrity that define you and not the outwardly things like looks and status that could be here today and gone tomorrow.

Most important is that you need to love who you are as a person. You are unique and there is nobody like you and I would not change on thing about you because I love you just the way you are.

Mom, what’s a ….?

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Image by moonstarsilverwolf

I think that is every parent’s nightmare.  When your child comes up to you and asks you a question that you were hoping the school or his textbooks would have already taught him.  There was a time that life was simple the rules were in place and fear was the primary trigger that kept kids out of trouble.  But nowadays life is fast and complicated, the rules are lax and its the degree of trouble that kids get into that people talk about.

Not only that -the age at which children get exposed to ‘grown up’ issues are now getting younger and younger.  Taking that into consideration, I would rather be prepared than in denial.  Now having being brought up in a society where talks about sexuality is taboo, makes it harder, however living in a country where there seems is availability of information – makes it easier.  What is ironic is that the land that gave you the kama sutra has no idea how to raise sexually healthy kids.  It is not something that is discussed at all.

So what is a parent to do?  Talk to your kids, make them aware of what is appropriate and what your values are.  They should be able to come to you and talk to you about any topic without having to worry about you getting mad at them because you were not prepared for it.  It is better they hear it from you than some kid in their class who overheard his older brother’s or sisters one sided conversation on the phone.  Tell them the facts.  Tell them what could happen health wise and the risks.  Tell them what could happen to their future, their dreams and be open.

Most important – trust your children to make the right decision.  Teach them to respect other people and their decisions. There is nothing wrong in saying ‘NO’.  It takes more courage to say no than to say yes. No?

Power of Influence

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Image by HiggySTFC

So you think nobody is watching?  Think again.

Do you know that everything you do has an influence on someone or the other?  Sometimes they come into your life for a reason and a season.  I am sure you have seen this story or heard about it at least.  Two boys are walking home from school and one drops his books.  As he bends to pick it up, the other boy helps him gather his stuff and starts talking and invites him over to play.  They remain best friends their whole life.  Many years later he confesses to his friend that helping him pick up his books that one day, changed his life.  He had cleaned out his locker and was going home to   commit suicide.

That story is kind of extreme but power of influence is true nonetheless.  You influence someone every time and every day.  Your actions speak louder than words.  I never realized it until some mentioned it to me, but how you treat your parents is how your kids will treat you.  As a teacher I know, how you teach the subject has a definite influence on how you inculcate the love of the subject in the student.

I thought you have to learn everything by a certain age – but that is not true.  You learn by watching and listening.  Each person lends a personality to their actions – be it singing, dancing, writing or just doing.  There is a method to the madness.  When you live with roommates, you pick up on things that you feel will help you. You see things that you like doing and include it as part of your routine. You see how others celebrate and you create your own traditions.

I am sure many of you have said ‘O my God I sound just like my mother!”  Pretty powerful influence there, don’t you think?  It is both the big and small things that have an impact. You hear influential leaders speak – but so many do not walk the talk.  And then you have those that don’t say much but just keep doing.

Everything you do, someone is watching. It could be your kids, the kid next door, your co-worker, or friend, it could even be your boss, your students or your teacher.  Pretty powerful stuff!

Yikes!

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Image by Michael Filion

That is the sign of panic setting in – I turn around and time has flown – January is over???  It cannot be – it seems like yesterday when it was getting close to Christmas time and plans were being made for presents and vacation and new year resolutions.  Apparently time did pass by – but yours truly did not even realize how quickly that can happen.

So all those plans of things to do instead of staying in the planning stage needs to go into the execution stage.  Have you ever felt like that?  So what to do now?

Go back to project planning basics – go back and see what you have to do and how much time you have to do it.  Then prioritize and start implementing.  The important thing is not to lose focus and not to lose hope.  I never realized what all I had accomplished until something was mentioned in conversation about how I managed to do stuff against all odds.  Ironically I never thought of it like that, actually I never thought of anything else other than my goal.

Interestingly – if you listen to what the Grammy winners have to say they will all tell you it is focus – they are all driven focused – the awards come later, when you do what you do best and do it all the time.

You know how things happen when they need to happen or you get a sign – well, the first sign I got was when I read about Pat Flynn’s posting schedule. (check out www.smartpassiveincome.com) I would like to be consistent in posting but life kind of gets in the way – but then this blog is writing about life so what’s my excuse?  If I miss posting regularly I start to panic inside – and then I know I really need to start worrying when my fan base ( you know who you are ;) ) start to call to find out what happened to my posting.  So I like the idea of a posting schedule – using Pat’s example – I will be posting Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.  As I work out that schedule – I should be coming up with categories too.

I do have a million other things in this list that I started in my mind – I need to get that down on paper and start executing it (sounds violent – doesn’t it?)  But February is awesome – shortest month of the year, start planting your seeds and the Winter Olympics.  So much to do, so little time(sigh!)